


How could I say the things that I’d scream?

by ILoveMisha2



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Confusion, Family, Hurt, Other, Sam - Freeform, Supernatural - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-10
Updated: 2014-11-10
Packaged: 2018-02-24 21:30:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2597057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ILoveMisha2/pseuds/ILoveMisha2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>i'm bad at summary's and always forget to write the disclaimer. sorry</p>
            </blockquote>





	How could I say the things that I’d scream?

The things I’d say aren’t the same that I’d scream, and the things that I’d say would be no secret as the things that I’d scream would be secrets buried so deep that they’d make me bleed.

The first thing I’d say is how tired of this life I really am. Dad just doesn’t understand.

The first thing I’d scream is how every time I ran away, I wasn’t running from dad or Dean but from myself. I was running from who I knew I’d always be.

I’d say how much I loved Dean for everything he sacrificed for me. I dragged him down while he tried to push me up and beyond what I knew I was capable of. He held onto me even when no one held onto him.

I’d scream at dad for the damage he caused.

Of course mom was important but he should’ve worried about the living, about us.

I’d tell him everything refusing to be interrupted and demanding to be heard.

I’d say that Dean needed to open up before he suffocated himself. I’d say he should speak up and stop being that perfect soldier dad demanded he be, because dad was dead and gone. Who was left to be a soldier to now? Who was left to demand things that could never be fulfilled?

I’d scream at the world for the wrongs it had done, not just to me. I’d scream for my mother, Jess, and my brother.

I’d say God made a mistake when he chose this life of Hell and Heaven for us.

The things I’d say aren’t the same that I’d scream.

I wouldn’t say and I wouldn’t scream.

I couldn’t and I can’t.

If I did I’d be dead from the truth I try to bury deep inside.

I can’t say, I can’t scream.

What does that mean?


End file.
